I Need More Than Feel-Good Answers

[I started writing this post last week, but have been adding to it little by little and it's finally finished... a week later...]

This last Tuesday was the first time in a long time that I went to a church/group/Bible study where I walked away still thinking about what we talked about… and am still thinking about. We have a weekly Bible study with 4 other couples who we are slowly but surely growing deeper with and connecting more with. This last Tuesday we discussed how to live a balanced life in this high-stress society. Michael and I both thought the discussion would end in about 5 minutes because the all we could think of to say were church-isms and feel-good answers—pray, just rest in God, etc. But those answers don’t really help when you feel up to your eyeballs in life’s chaos. Yes, there are ways to take time for yourself, but the core issue came down to what does it look like to take refuge in God and spend quality time with him when you really feel no desire to do so; no drive or pull to open your Bible or take a few minutes to pray (without falling asleep or your mind wandering). I think it’s hard to have been a Christian almost my entire life, so I’ve heard it all and seen it all, so nothing is really a new concept to me. I know what you’re “supposed” to do, but a quiet time where I sit and read my Bible for an hour every day is not going to help me grow. It’ll just make me feel bad when I don’t do it or don’t get anything out of it. I thrive off conversation, discussion, dissecting verses and context, bringing up different ideas, debating, etc. So how can I get that when I’m sitting by myself in my room, trying not to fall asleep, or take my entire lunch hour to read my Bible and feel like a legalistic Christian who’s making a point of using my time to relax and get out of the office to show the world I’m reading my Bible. Yes, I know I could use my lunch hour to read my Bible and pray, but as I said before, that bores me. But what about reading a book that is written about the Bible or about religion or something “Christian” that isn’t the Bible. I’m currently reading Everything Must Change by Brian McLaren (yes, I know I’m way behind the times) and it’s really speaking to what I’ve been feeling about the Christian church and how Christians view the world. If I’m finding purpose and seeing God in that book, is it the same as a traditional quiet time? I know reading another book can be a cop-out, but it also opens my eyes and my heart to things the Bible teaches and different ideas that people have—hence my desire for discussion and debate—I like new and different ideas, so reading really does that for me. Growing my knowledge, my understanding of the Bible and the world around me, and growing myself as a person seem like legitimate ways to grow closer to God. If I can have a healthy relationship with my friends, who God has blessed me with, I can fully appreciate and get out of that friendship what I need and want. I use what God has taught me through books and discussions to better myself and better others. Doesn’t that make more sense than just sitting down and opening up my Bible to a random verse on a random page? I’m continuing to really think/pray about this and figure out what I should do and what God would want from me as an individual. Hopefully this group will take me to a place that I can grow even more and I can find God in places I don’t expect.

An Answer to Prayer!!

I posted a blog a while ago about not having many friends and being frustrated with the ones I had. The frustrations with those friends I mentioned are still there, if not completely dissolved right along with the friendships. It was more of a mutual, lack-of-continuing to invest in the friendship kind of thing, so it wasn't too rough. We are still civil to each other and enjoy running into each other at church or even REI (that happened yesterday), but we wont make it a point to call or get together.
Being sad and upset over failed friendships isn't what this post is about. Actually, this post is a post of celebration!
After I wrote that post, we were invited to a young marrieds bbq. What happened that night was nothing short of an answer to prayer. The group of people who attended (there were about 4 or 5 couples) clicked and we enjoyed their company late into the night (1am if I remember correctly). And since then, most of the couples TOOK INITIATIVE and invited people over and our friendship grew. All summer, we have been connecting and growing deeper together. We grew enough that now we are going to be in a Bible study with those couples (I'll write a post about that later to digest my thoughts on it).
We found friends who liked us and we liked them. They told us "we want to get to know you, we like you" and we said it back. We have been aching for friends who we can rely on and know have our backs if we ever need them. We needed friends who will open up and share their true selves and we will do the same. And through these friends, we have found all of these things! We have prayed for good friends and even for some specific things, things that we have found in these friends. I don't expect that we'll be friends forever, but for now, we can be together and experience life with them for now... but who knows, they could be life-long friends! We'll see what God and life have in store for us!
Oh, I also have to mention our friends who we went driving up in the mountains with this weekend. We have barely seen them all summer, but this weekend they loved us more than any of our friends have in a long time! We had the most wonderful day with them and hated that we had to end the day early (Michael had to work his last night at the restaurant). We love our friends so much!
And from those friendships as couples, I've ended up deepening friendships with the women. I have had lunch numerous times with one friend, had dinner with another, and have gone to ice cream twice with yet another. Every time, my heart just bursts! I get so excited about making deep girl-friendships! My heart has longed and ached for that, and I'm finally getting it. And the friendships aren't surface-level either-- we talk about deep issues like marriage, family life growing up (and still dealing with), etc.
And my friend from our Meals that Matter group (it's a quarterly thing at our church to sign up and you have dinner once a week for 6-8 weeks with people who live around you... awesome idea!) who we have a scheduled lunch date every Tuesday! Sometimes, we eat together more than once a week, just because we want to and enjoy each other that much. With the other girls from church, I've had to initially initiate the get-together, but with this friend, we do it equally. I've never been pursued as a friend before-- I've always been the one pursuing. And it feels amazing to be told "I like you! I want to spend time with you!" Again, it makes my heart so happy. I walk back to work refreshed and energized by spending time with her. Michael and I are even house-sitting for her and her husband this week!
I am so excited about the answer to prayer that has happened in my life. I just hope things don't turn sour again and I'm back at square one. But this feels different-- these friends want to be friends and want to take the time to grow and develop our friendship. And if I start becoming the one to always initiate again, I will deal with it or just let the friendship fizzle away to courtesy because the other person obviously isn't interested enough to keep it going.
So, praise Jesus! :-) I have found friends! Friends I can connect with and grow with, be there for and embrace. I am just so excited about where life is headed in regards to friendships... now if only we can make the guys connect more outside of a group setting and Michael can gain some solid friendships as well! That's my next prayer... let's see God work!

The "Supposed To's" of Marriage and God

How much of a role does God really play in relationships? I have been rolling this thought over in my mind, trying to really process it and understand it. All during my high school years, I was taught "God needs to be the center of your relationship" but that idea was never really explained to me. What does that really mean? What does that look like? I tried all kinds of things, going to the same church, praying together, discussing the Bible, etc. But each individual act never seemed like enough. Just because we prayed together didn't mean God was the true center of our relationship.
However, I say all this, and I could say that (on a good day) God is the center of my marriage. We focus on God's will for us individually and as a couple, as well as (try to) pray together and read the Bible together.
Lately, though, those practices seem to have fallen by the wayside. We're busy, we're tired, we'd rather do something else... the excuses seem to pile up and God gets forgotten. But then so does the health and spiritual well-being of our marriage. I can see it change how we interact with one another and other people, as well as how we view our marriage one day to the next. There seems to be an absence, a void and negativity are present. We fight more, we overreact, we get defensive... makes for a lousy time, that's for sure.
But what does reading the Bible do? Could we still feel a deeper connection if we read a novel together? What is that spiritual aspect that is so important? We are busy people, and we make the time to spend with friends, work, church, etc., but not for reading the Bible together, or praying or doing any sort of devotional or study. How do we balance that, especially when Michael doesn't get home until 10pm and we're both too tired? Are we "supposed" to pray even though the act of closing our eyes to pray would make us fall asleep? Or are we "supposed" to get up early together to do something, with the same problem of falling asleep? How do busy people do it? Or are we "supposed" to set aside the time that we aren't working and are together, and spend a few minutes reading the Bible, praying, etc. But when Michael is working 4-5 nights a week, it gets difficult to even find the time to do that. But if something is a priority, we'll make it happen. So we'll see what we figure out!
God values relationships, so it makes sense that by taking the time to value our relationship with Him, He'll bless us and make our relationship a bit easier/closer. I know that praying and reading your Bible isn't the miracle cure to marriage hardships, but by growing closer together through reading the Bible sure puts you on the right path for it. When our relationship becomes nothing but fighting and resentment, something definitely needs to change. So here's to change and trying to refocus our relationship back on the one who brought us together. It wont be easy, but it will be good!

"All By Myself"

Pathways, my church, has started a series titled "Friends with Benefits." No, it's not about that... It's about the benefits that friendships and relationships bring to someone and how absolutely essential they are to someone's life and well-being.
This week's topic was loneliness. I can honestly I have experienced my fair share of loneliness because of a lack of friends. I have spent my entire life having friends for a period of time, and then for one reason or another, I end up back at square one. And continuing to experience that feeling makes each time that much lonelier than the last.
It's been difficult for me over these last few months because, well, Michael and I got married and moved to a new area. We know our landlords (the woman married us), but that's about it. We've made friends at our church through the young marrieds group, but those friendships are struggling. There are numerous, complicated reasons for different people acting and reacting the way they do and why Michael and I end up as the initiators with every friendship we find ourselves in. How do people not end up calling one another? How does it fall on certain people? Are the only friendships worth pursuing and growing the ones that show mutual interest and initiation? Do people just "click"? Is that the only way you know that they'll be good/healthy friendships? And how quickly do you delve into a friendship? Can you just create it overnight or does it have to take a lot of time to really get to know them and to know what kind of people/person they really are? Because if you click, wouldn't you assume that you'd be good friends? Or is that too shallow of a point of view of it?
These thoughts have been running through my head since Sunday and really bugs me that the topic of loneliness struck me so deep to the core. Honestly, it wasn't that great of a sermon and didn't really teach me anything new, but it did stir up those emotions to get me motivated to do something about it-- call a friend to get together for lunch, attend the knitting club, plan a get-together with a different friend/acquaintance. But as a side note, it just really bugs me that the purpose of the young marrieds group was to make friends, but no one seems to have the time or motivation to do so... irritating. Anyway, I have been praying a lot about this and keep hoping that God will bring the right people into Michael's and my life. To find friends like my parents have-- they've had the same friends since about the time I was born (I'm 22). Where are these kinds of people? How do you find them?
Well, we'll see how life goes. I attended a knitting club last night and it was a fun time! A very diverse group of women, but very interesting and lively conversation! So we'll see what comes from that! And continuing to invest in the friendships I already have and try to strengthen and grow those friendships. What an exhausting feat!

Missing Emergent Churches

Last Sunday at church, Michael had the honor of singing with the worship band. (He wouldn't let me take any pictures...) He was asked to sing the song "Fix You," by Coldplay as a solo because the key was too high for the worship leader. At the second service, he got a standing ovation! (It was weird because our church rarely claps after any song.) He absolutely blew them away! I was so proud of him. (I think he sang it way better, but that's my biased opinion... ;-)



So after that performance, our worship leader asked Michael to join him in playing for a conference that was being hosted here in town. Not thinking too much of it, he agreed. Well, it turned out it was an emergent conference where Tony Jones and Doug Paggit (sp??) were attending. (I shook Tony Jones' hand... there's my "emergent" claim to fame ;-) We were part of an emergent church, and had missed it. The church we go to now is somewhat emergent, but there are aspects that are missing that we really enjoyed. So it was so refreshing to be there and get to experience an emergent community again. It took a little getting used to it again, but once we did it was a supernatural experience. They had about 6 prayer stations set up, and each one spoke directly to something that was going on in my life. It was awesome!
After that was over, we discussed how the friends we are making at church are good friends, but we don't always see eye to eye on issues. Needless to say, we are definitely the odd couple out. In emergent groups, our way of thinking and living are "normal," not different or weird. We tend to butt heads with our friends who are not familiar with "emergent ideas" when it comes to ideas of missional, community, love, and church. Although we love our church and will continue attending, it was very apparent that we should get hooked up with the emergent cohort in Denver. Exciting! I'm sure I'll see some of you around!

Where's the Line?

My last post was about the sermon given on Sunday and I have another part of it I want to digest. The teacher on Sunday was talking about deeper devotions with God and during our young marrieds group when we were discussing the notes for the sermon beforehand, we got to talking about devotions as in "quiet time." I'll be the first to admit that I'm the worst at keeping a regular quiet time where I sit down, pray, read my Bible, write in my journal, and/or read part of a Christian book (I'm trying to get through Utmost for His Highest). Even when I'm sitting at home looking for a job, I can't seem to find the time to have a quite time!
My biggest struggle is that I have conflicting feelings about wanting to spend quality time with God without it becoming legalistic. I've heard that we should think of our time with God as a time with our friends-- well, I don't see my friends that often. I see some of them once a year! Those who I'm closer to, I'll see every couple of weeks or so... is that how often we should spend time with God? I don't think so, but where is the line-- The line between having to do it because we should and wanting to do it because He's God? Do I just have to think about it as something I have to do and it will become something I want to do? But should God be like a habit? That just seems weird! Is praying in the car on the way to wherever enough? Is sitting quietly without any sort of religious text around okay/enough? Or is it just an "easy way out" by putting the least amount of effort into it while wanting the most effort put in on the other end? I can tell you that friendships/relationships do not last long if that's what someone does! Relationships require equal input and output-- I can't expect God to be any different.
But it all goes back to my initial question-- where's the line? Can a overwhelming desire to read my Bible and take time out of my day to spend time alone with God just be created out of thin air? Does it take some initial habitual reading to get into it? It'll take some more digesting and prayer and whatever to strengthen my relationship with God. Anyone got any other thoughts on this subject?

I'm in Need of Prayer

So it's come to this. I'm jobless and so is my fiance and the wedding is only 2 1/2 months away... I'm not usually one to ask for help, especially prayer for things for myself, but I'm feeling desperate. I am trying all I can to find a job, and now Michael only has a few months until he starts school to find a job and work as much as he can. So I'm putting this request out there to ask any of you who read this blog to please pray for me and Michael to both find jobs and to find them quickly. We don't need much money, but we can't survive on nothing. So your prayers are appreciated. Not only do we need prayer for jobs, but also for the patience and clarity that God is in control of everything and it will all turn out alright in the end. Thanks and now on to more job searching...

Coffee on Fire

Now that I'm finally done with school, the holidays are over, and I have internet in my house, I can finally write about some deeper thoughts. So here we go...
As I had mentioned before in a blog, I had the opportunity to be a barista at a local coffee shop in Fort Collins. It was at a coffee shop owned by a local church to have something to use the space 6 of the 7 days of the week. So, coincidentally, most of the people who go there and work there are Christians. My sister and I worked with a man, who I'll call John, who was a very passionate man. At first, it seemed very awkward when he would randomly ask questions that had to do with the Bible, Jesus, etc.
For example, when the Colorado Rockies were in the playoffs, many of the people in there were online trying to get tickets. John then asked my sister and I, "if Jesus were in here, what would he think?" Honestly, at first I was a bit annoyed-- like Jesus would care if we wanted to buy tickets to go to a baseball game. But the more we worked with him, the more interesting and thought-provoking his questions became (even more importantly, less irritating). They made me think, even days after I worked with him. For example, here's a question he asked: "Was Jesus the only perfect person mentioned in the Bible? If you look at Job 1:8, it says "Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil." Does that mean he was sinless? Was he perfect? Because blameless means perfect." Pretty interesting question, right? Every week, he would ask my sister and I some question and we would discuss it. He was always thinking about and talking about Jesus and God and the Bible. It was so apparent that he was on fire for God. I soon realized that I was no longer irritated with the questions, I no longer thought he was an over-zealous, legalistic Christian trying to condemn everyone with his questions; but now thought of him as his a great seeker and model for how Jesus talked about being consumed with God. By no means am I saying John is perfect, but I am saying that he is living a life that I strive to live. I put my Bible on my bookshelf where it sits for days, even weeks sometimes, putting God at the bottom of my priority list. John's passion for Jesus and making God the focus of his life and conversation is remarkable.
So all of this gets me thinking: am I like this? Do people see Jesus in me? Or am I just another person on the street? Are my thoughts consumed with thoughts of Jesus and His life? Is it even possible, having been a Christian for my whole life, to be as on fire for God as a relatively new Christian? What hinders me from making God my #1 priority? Why doesn't the need for reading my Bible and praying and taking time out of my day to spend it with God overwhelm everything else? More importantly, how can I have the hunger for it without getting legalistic about it? I can tell you that New Year resolutions don't help either! Every January I read my Bible every day... and it only take a few weeks for that to slow down and eventually become what it always is-- once every two weeks, at best.
So here's to a new year and a new chance to start over. I know what kind of life I want to be living, so with the help of God and support of others, I will work my way to living the life I want. That's all I can realistically do.

Disturb Us, Lord

I heard this prayer read today and I thought I'd share it. It's really interesting. Read it and think/pray about it:

Prayer of Sir Francis Drake

Disturb us, Lord, when we are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord, when With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life, We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth, We have allowed our vision Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly, To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land, We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future In strength, courage, hope, and love.

Jumping With My Eyes Closed

This picture symbolizes how I'm feeling at the moment... jumping off a cliff, with my eyes closed, praying to God that I will land on my feet (not my head) on solid ground. My life is so up in the air and I am seeking direction from God in so many aspects of my life! So if I feel God directing one part of my life in one direction, I don't really meditate on it or think about it for a while-- I jump! I trust that I have heard God's calling and I walk in that faith. And if I'm wrong, I trust God will bring me back to where He wants me. I'm just praying I'm landing where God wants me cuz I definitely feel like I'm jumping off and hoping I don't fall and land flat on my face! (Thankfully, God extends a LOT of grace (and band-aids) in case I do!)

Does this bother you?

I get a "Quote of the Day" thing on my homepage and this quote was there and I really liked it:

We need not to be let alone. We need to be really bothered once in a while. How long is it since you were really bothered? About something important, about something real?
- Ray Bradbury

At first, I didn't think too much about it, but when I started thinking about my own life, it really struck me. What kinds of things really bother me? How long has it been since God really tugged on my heart? When was the last time I actually did something about it? What issues--social, personal, etc-- do I really care about?
This quote really convicted me of how I have been living my life. I haven't been bothered enough! Only recently have I become passionate about different issues... but I still struggle with actually doing something about it-- griping about it changes nothing!
I've had to realize that I need to allow myself to be bothered. Sounds uncomfortable, I know! But if I guard myself against being bothered about things-- my life, my relationships, my faith, social injustices, tragedies, etc-- I won't grow as a person. I easily say, "well, it doesn't directly effect me, so it doesn't matter" or "what will worrying about it do?" However, if you worry about it enough, change will happen because you won't want it there, nagging at the back of your mind. You'll actually do something to change it! So I will pray that God will give me the strength to open myself up to being bothered. And especially to do something about the things that end up bothering me. Imagine the change that could happen if everyone allowed themselves to be bothered

Don't Forget to Push Your Button

I guess I'm in a writing mood tonight! Anyway, there has been something I've been thinking about ever since I had a discussion about it with my wonderful sister last week (and it came up again when talking to a friend a few days later). We were talking about prayer and God answering prayer. My sister has a friend who told her that she believes God punished her by not getting a job because she didn't pray for it enough. What?! What sense does that make? Yeah, it's important to consult God about everything, but I don't believe God punishes you for not praying about it first and especially not praying about it enough! Yes, I believe God answers all prayer. However, the discussion was about if someone says they commit to pray about something or for someone every day, but forget to do it one day, will God still answer/bless the person/thing they were praying for? Will God not do something because we (as imperfect people) forget to pray?
I know there is the whole idea of asking for blessings and God not giving what isn't asked for. However, what about when it's something like blessing someone that day? Will God give them (even punish them with) a crappy day just because you didn't ask God to bless them? Or is it the thought that counts? God will do what He wants, and if including you in blessing someone or touching their life in some way, then so be it. But would God deliberately hold back a blessing because someone didn't ask it on behalf of someone else? Or would you not be influential and show God's love to someone if you didn't ask God to help you do so before you interacted with them? I believe God uses people where they are at, and that is not necessarily when you are kneeling by your bed to pray.
You see a coworker having a bad day and you go over and encourage them, maybe even pray for/with them. Would God not have you help that friend out if you hadn't prayed beforehand? Of course not! I think it is important to keep God in a constant dialogue, but I am the walking, talking example of how hard that is! However, God has used me in people's lives when I haven't specifically prayed for anyone, and even when I haven't read my Bible in a few days (it gets really hard being a college student... excuses, excuses, I know!). It's important and vital to pray, but I don't think God is as picky as only acting when you ask Him to. I think He's a little bit bigger than that! I am not saying people shouldn't pray for others, because I believe that is very important and can result in miracles! However, I am against putting God in a prayer box and thinking He only acts when we want Him to. God is so huge and incomprehensible and will do what He wants and will act within His perfect will for each and every person's life. God understands that we are imperfect and cannot always do what we say we will (especially when it involves doing something every day).
God is grace-- that's all it really comes down to. God is going to extend His grace to you and whoever/whatever you are praying for, so it is not our worry if they are going to be blessed by God. God will bless them if He wants to bless them that day. Our prayer for their blessing is acting in love and obedience towards God. If we fear that God is going to punish us or someone else because we didn't pray is telling God that we don't trust that he has everything under control. We are taking God's blessings into our own hands and are telling God how it should be done. It is also very selfish. Yes, it's important to pray for our friends and coworkers, but saying your actions are going to determine their days and lives is egotistical. God is bigger than us, and we have no control over God. We cannot tell Him what to do. We can only ask and wait patiently for the answer. Demanding God to do something seems pretty ridiculous if you ask me! God hears your prayers and hears your heart. He knows what is going on and He knows your deepest desires. He also knows what is best for you, and for your friends. Praying every day is not a "Bless Them" button we push every day. We especially do not have to fear God pushing the "Shitty Day" button because you didn't do our job and push our button. So continue to pray for blessings for others, but don't get too high and mighty about it and think God won't do it without your asking. Because He's higher and mightier than we could ever begin to imagine!

Fecal Reading and Bible-Dipping

"Finch's face reddened as his excitement grew. 'See? See the way the top of the coil breaks up out of the surface of the water? Holy Father!... Do you know what this means?...It means our financial situation is turning around, that's what it means. It means things are looking up. The shit is pointing out of the pot and up toward heaven, to God.'"
-- Augusten Burroughs, Running With Scissors, pg. 166-167

When reading the book, “Running with Scissors,” (which is a memoir, by the way—which means everything in the book actually happened!) the only thing you can say about it is that the people in it are absolutely insane. Not just weird and kinda crazy at times—they are completely, 100% insane. They eat dog food as a snack, let 13 and 14 year old children have relationships with 30 and 40 year old adults, eat candy off a 5 month old Christmas tree, and last but not least, believe God talks to them through their feces. This blog isn’t a review of the book. This is a commentary of the “insane” practices of Dr. Finch and his family.

While most of us don’t try to interpret the size, shape, and color of our feces, we do tend to use “insane,” surface-level, self-made ways of having God speak to us. For example, a much less insane instance in the story, one that could actually be part of people’s Bible-reading lives is this: Bible-dipping. The family in the story open their Bible and point to a random word to make their decisions or figure out what God is telling them about their lives.

"All the Finches did bible-dips. It was like asking a Magic Eight Ball a question, only you were asking God. The way it worked was, one person held the bible while another person thought of a question to ask God, like, 'Should I get my hair cut short?' Then the person holding the bible opened it at random, and the person asking the question dropped his or her finger on the page. Whatever word your finger landed on, this was your answer...In Thorne's Market Hope couldn't decide between a tuna or a turkey sandwich so, even though there was a line behind her, she pulled out her white bible. She did the dip herself, because she was in a hurry. 'Harvest,' she said...'Aren't turkeys grain fed? They are, I think. So that's pretty close to harvest... I'll take turkey. But on multigrain just to make sure.'"
-- Pg. 76-78

While all of the other practices of the Finch family would never be done by any normal or even slightly crazy person, Bible-dipping is actually a pretty common occurrence. I can admit that I’ve done something quite similar, by just randomly opening my Bible and reading whatever verse comes up first. I have to admit, God has talked to me by doing that, but I can count the number of times on one hand. However, it got me thinking about how small we make God. We make him manageable and simple—just open the Bible and He will talk to you. I believe the Bible is 100% true and God can speak through any verse at any time for any person, however, that is not usually the way He communicates. It also takes the work for the answers from God and gives it to ourselves. We are trying to find the answers on our own time with our own energy and random practices. It doesn't allow God to move in our lives as He pleases and with his perfect timing. It becomes all about us and fulfilling our own desires, not letting God fulfill us.

Another idea that is dealt with in the Bible-dipping is how far it’s taken. God should be the center of our lives and we should seek his guidance in everything. However, unlike the girl, Hope, who Bible-dips to decide what kind of sandwich to order, there is a point to where our free will comes into play.

God has given us free will. We can make decisions on our own, whether from personal taste/ character, or from past experience. Ordering a turkey sandwich instead of a tuna sandwich will not change your life. If you prefer turkey, order that—God has given that to you to enjoy. There is not a more “holy” meat or meal, and all food is good because God made all food. God has given it to us to enjoy. We have free will to choose what we like and dislike. If we have our lives completely consumed and focused on God, our actions will reflect the will of God. Our personal tastes, however, will not go away. God loves us and wants us to enjoy life. He didn’t create us to be robots, walking around unhappy and bored. He wants us to enjoy life, live it to the fullest. Enjoy and love the people around us. Love those who Jesus loves. Follow God wherever He leads. Don’t Bible-dip to find the answers—talk right to God and He will answer (in his own time, of course). And definitely don’t be examining your toilet for answers. God is big enough that He will answer you and you won’t have to search in your household appliances for the answers. We just have to be willing to receive the answer and do what He says. Our lives wont ever be boring or mundane if we walk in the will of God. God is crazy and chaotic and adventurous—it’s when we’re not walking in His will that life gets boring and purposeless. Sitting and listening to our incomprehensible maker is the only way to live!

Oh, and on another note, I highly recommend this book! It's definitely full of dark, twisted humor, but is incredibly interesting! If you like stories about crazy people, this book is definitely for you!