Don't Forget to Push Your Button

I guess I'm in a writing mood tonight! Anyway, there has been something I've been thinking about ever since I had a discussion about it with my wonderful sister last week (and it came up again when talking to a friend a few days later). We were talking about prayer and God answering prayer. My sister has a friend who told her that she believes God punished her by not getting a job because she didn't pray for it enough. What?! What sense does that make? Yeah, it's important to consult God about everything, but I don't believe God punishes you for not praying about it first and especially not praying about it enough! Yes, I believe God answers all prayer. However, the discussion was about if someone says they commit to pray about something or for someone every day, but forget to do it one day, will God still answer/bless the person/thing they were praying for? Will God not do something because we (as imperfect people) forget to pray?
I know there is the whole idea of asking for blessings and God not giving what isn't asked for. However, what about when it's something like blessing someone that day? Will God give them (even punish them with) a crappy day just because you didn't ask God to bless them? Or is it the thought that counts? God will do what He wants, and if including you in blessing someone or touching their life in some way, then so be it. But would God deliberately hold back a blessing because someone didn't ask it on behalf of someone else? Or would you not be influential and show God's love to someone if you didn't ask God to help you do so before you interacted with them? I believe God uses people where they are at, and that is not necessarily when you are kneeling by your bed to pray.
You see a coworker having a bad day and you go over and encourage them, maybe even pray for/with them. Would God not have you help that friend out if you hadn't prayed beforehand? Of course not! I think it is important to keep God in a constant dialogue, but I am the walking, talking example of how hard that is! However, God has used me in people's lives when I haven't specifically prayed for anyone, and even when I haven't read my Bible in a few days (it gets really hard being a college student... excuses, excuses, I know!). It's important and vital to pray, but I don't think God is as picky as only acting when you ask Him to. I think He's a little bit bigger than that! I am not saying people shouldn't pray for others, because I believe that is very important and can result in miracles! However, I am against putting God in a prayer box and thinking He only acts when we want Him to. God is so huge and incomprehensible and will do what He wants and will act within His perfect will for each and every person's life. God understands that we are imperfect and cannot always do what we say we will (especially when it involves doing something every day).
God is grace-- that's all it really comes down to. God is going to extend His grace to you and whoever/whatever you are praying for, so it is not our worry if they are going to be blessed by God. God will bless them if He wants to bless them that day. Our prayer for their blessing is acting in love and obedience towards God. If we fear that God is going to punish us or someone else because we didn't pray is telling God that we don't trust that he has everything under control. We are taking God's blessings into our own hands and are telling God how it should be done. It is also very selfish. Yes, it's important to pray for our friends and coworkers, but saying your actions are going to determine their days and lives is egotistical. God is bigger than us, and we have no control over God. We cannot tell Him what to do. We can only ask and wait patiently for the answer. Demanding God to do something seems pretty ridiculous if you ask me! God hears your prayers and hears your heart. He knows what is going on and He knows your deepest desires. He also knows what is best for you, and for your friends. Praying every day is not a "Bless Them" button we push every day. We especially do not have to fear God pushing the "Shitty Day" button because you didn't do our job and push our button. So continue to pray for blessings for others, but don't get too high and mighty about it and think God won't do it without your asking. Because He's higher and mightier than we could ever begin to imagine!

Can You Prove God?

So I'm taking a class this semester called, "Religions of the West." It's about Christianity, Judaism, and Islam (and Atheism actually). Before I even walked in the classroom on the first day, I knew it was going to be a fascinating class. Oh, and let this be a warning, because it is a philosophy class and it's about religions-- it really makes me think--which will cause a lot of blogs! I am excited to learn about the different religions and process what I learned. I'm especially excited to see how it will strengthen my own beliefs and theology. So here goes the first digestion of topics discussed last week:

In my class, the first religion we are studying is atheism. It really helps to understand what people believe when they don't believe in a higher being. At first, I thought it was weird to be studying atheism in a religions class, but come to find out, a religion is just a set of beliefs. We could have gotten into the discussion about if capitalism could be considered a religion, but thankfully my teacher spared me that boredom (at least for now... who knows what the rest of the semester holds)! Anyway, we are studying prominent and influential atheists-- Marx, Freud, and some guy I can't remember the name of (give me a break, it's only been 2 weeks of class!). Last week we discussed Marx's ideas about religion. It was fascinating! Marx believed that the poor believed in the Bible, and especially the idea of Heaven, to give them hope and religion helped the rich keep them in their low positions. The rich got richer while they exploited the poor who believed they'd get something better someday. Marx saw this as weak. He believed people needed a reason for their suffering and "the last will become first" idea gave them that reason.
My thoughts on this is how can hanging on to hope be considered weak? Since when is hope weak? It is the source of life! It is what keeps people going from day to day, even when those days are bleak and gray. Jesus hung out with the poor and hopeless-- they are who he loved (he loves everyone, of course), but he especially came for the lowly people-- those who needed hope, the doctor to the sick.
Also, if there is no afterlife, what is the purpose of living? For what purpose do we do good works and love other people if our lives and souls end when our heart stops beating? If we have no one to tell us what makes life worth living, what is the purpose of living? Why wouldn't people just do what they want? (which gets into the debate of whether people are inherently good or evil...)
Another thought: Why do people submit our own lives to an incomprehensible being, someone we can't actually measure or evaluate or really even understand? Religion becomes a very personal experience. God is real to those who believe in him and experience him. God is everywhere. But how do you prove His existence? Is there any way to take the personal experience with God into public, outside of the walls of your bedroom and the walls of your church? Is it just shown through our actions and our love? I know God is real and alive and omnipresent, but how can I convey that to everyone else? I know showing his unconditional love is key to it all... but is there anything else? How we can show God to other people is a very personal experience and decision and walk for everyone. God works in so many ways-- there is no set mold or equation that God uses for everyone. That's what makes God amazing!
There are so many thoughts and questions and ideas running through my head, I can't even begin to type fast enough! I know I've only begun to scratch the surface of this theological discussion, so I would love to hear everyone else's thoughts!
What are everyone's thoughts? If you were to talk to Marx about his views on religion (this is not about his political ideas and/or communism), what would you ask him? I'd love to hear anyone and everyone's thoughts!!

Not a Book Review... okay, maybe it kinda-sorta is

I apparently read a lot more than "normal" people do. I never thought it was that much-- just something to help me fall asleep at night and pass the time during down-time in the day. Because I like to read, I tend to read one novel and one theological/religious book (okay, maybe that is a lot). I just finished an amazing book, Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell, which is one of the best books EVER! I then picked up Brennan Manning's book, Ruthless Trust. It's the sequel to another amazing book, Ragamuffin Gospel. I just started it today while I was waiting for my last class (I have 30 minutes between classes...) and I didn't even get through the introduction before I was wanting to yell, "YES!" at the book and what he was saying. What he wrote was exactly what I am going through currently and what my church is currently teaching on. I thought this was amazing and interesting and also another person involved in trying to break the mold and traditions of church. This is a lot of babbling... I'll write it now. Enjoy!

"She knows that Jesus is comfortable with broken people who remembers who to love."

"Alert to the manipulations and machinations of the pharisaical self-righteousness, ragamuffins refuse to surrender control of their lives to rules and regulations. They see that the stale religiosity of legalists, trapped in the fatal narcissism of spiritual perfectionism, obscures the face of the God of Jesus."
-Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust, pg. xiv

What are your thoughts? Agree? Disagree? Further insights?

My Life is Over

A relationship has ended. It was tragic, heartless, and ungodly. No, I haven't ended things (again) with the current boyfriend. My relationship with my first love, the one and only chocolate, has ended. Because of conversations with the beau about fair trade and companies who hold to those standards (and especially those that don't-- like Starbucks, for example-- sorry to those who have a deep and intimate relationship with that company as well. I will be holding a mourning session for those who need it at my house tomorrow night at 6:30pm). Anyway, I went onto the Internet to see if my lover, Hershey's, was a Fair Trade company. (I feel really techno-savy because I just linked it... I'm a dork, I know! Back to what I was saying...) If you haven't guessed it already, they are not. I don't know what to do with myself. I have a giant Hershey's bar sitting on my desk right behind my laptop taunting me, "eat me! eat me!" However, all I can hear are the cries of the poor slave children who picked the cocoa beans to make my delicious piece of heaven! The devil has cursed it! My solution, however, because throwing away an unopened piece of chocolate would certainly send me straight to hell, is to eat the remaining chocolate in my room (you'd be surprised how much that is...) then try (key word!) to only buy chocolate that has been approved by Fair Trade organizations and/or sold at places like Wild Oats that sell only organic, fair traded food. Why do these companies have to be so crappy by using slave labor yet make such delicious addictions? I'm having such a crisis over this-- I don't think most people understand the devastation I am experiencing. I wanted to curl up in bed and cry and eat... chocolate! UGH! Vicious circle! The one thing that always makes me feel better, no matter what, is now the enemy-- how am I supposed to cope with this? My shrink is going to have a field day with this one ;-)

60 or 70 degrees-- is that too much to ask?

I'm cold. I'm freezing cold, to be exact. It's been below freezing for about a month straight! I have no body fat for insulation so I cannot naturally keep my body warm as it is. When it gets below freezing, you can always pick me out of a crowd because I'm the one completely bundled up from head to toe for the frigid winter air! I'm tired of the snow and I'm tired of the cold. I used to love snow. I used to want it to snow. Not any more. We've had 3 feet of snow for about a month now and it's not going away any time soon... ugh! It just needs to warm up enough to melt all of the snow AND ice away! I want my lovely, cool Colorado back-- I don't live in Michigan, so why is the weather acting like it? I've never been more eager for summer to come around (which I will then whine about it being too hot... vicious cycle!)! Okay, I'm done for now. I feel a lot better having gotten that off my chest! (And yes, that is my car. It was buried under all that snow! No fun!)

Fecal Reading and Bible-Dipping

"Finch's face reddened as his excitement grew. 'See? See the way the top of the coil breaks up out of the surface of the water? Holy Father!... Do you know what this means?...It means our financial situation is turning around, that's what it means. It means things are looking up. The shit is pointing out of the pot and up toward heaven, to God.'"
-- Augusten Burroughs, Running With Scissors, pg. 166-167

When reading the book, “Running with Scissors,” (which is a memoir, by the way—which means everything in the book actually happened!) the only thing you can say about it is that the people in it are absolutely insane. Not just weird and kinda crazy at times—they are completely, 100% insane. They eat dog food as a snack, let 13 and 14 year old children have relationships with 30 and 40 year old adults, eat candy off a 5 month old Christmas tree, and last but not least, believe God talks to them through their feces. This blog isn’t a review of the book. This is a commentary of the “insane” practices of Dr. Finch and his family.

While most of us don’t try to interpret the size, shape, and color of our feces, we do tend to use “insane,” surface-level, self-made ways of having God speak to us. For example, a much less insane instance in the story, one that could actually be part of people’s Bible-reading lives is this: Bible-dipping. The family in the story open their Bible and point to a random word to make their decisions or figure out what God is telling them about their lives.

"All the Finches did bible-dips. It was like asking a Magic Eight Ball a question, only you were asking God. The way it worked was, one person held the bible while another person thought of a question to ask God, like, 'Should I get my hair cut short?' Then the person holding the bible opened it at random, and the person asking the question dropped his or her finger on the page. Whatever word your finger landed on, this was your answer...In Thorne's Market Hope couldn't decide between a tuna or a turkey sandwich so, even though there was a line behind her, she pulled out her white bible. She did the dip herself, because she was in a hurry. 'Harvest,' she said...'Aren't turkeys grain fed? They are, I think. So that's pretty close to harvest... I'll take turkey. But on multigrain just to make sure.'"
-- Pg. 76-78

While all of the other practices of the Finch family would never be done by any normal or even slightly crazy person, Bible-dipping is actually a pretty common occurrence. I can admit that I’ve done something quite similar, by just randomly opening my Bible and reading whatever verse comes up first. I have to admit, God has talked to me by doing that, but I can count the number of times on one hand. However, it got me thinking about how small we make God. We make him manageable and simple—just open the Bible and He will talk to you. I believe the Bible is 100% true and God can speak through any verse at any time for any person, however, that is not usually the way He communicates. It also takes the work for the answers from God and gives it to ourselves. We are trying to find the answers on our own time with our own energy and random practices. It doesn't allow God to move in our lives as He pleases and with his perfect timing. It becomes all about us and fulfilling our own desires, not letting God fulfill us.

Another idea that is dealt with in the Bible-dipping is how far it’s taken. God should be the center of our lives and we should seek his guidance in everything. However, unlike the girl, Hope, who Bible-dips to decide what kind of sandwich to order, there is a point to where our free will comes into play.

God has given us free will. We can make decisions on our own, whether from personal taste/ character, or from past experience. Ordering a turkey sandwich instead of a tuna sandwich will not change your life. If you prefer turkey, order that—God has given that to you to enjoy. There is not a more “holy” meat or meal, and all food is good because God made all food. God has given it to us to enjoy. We have free will to choose what we like and dislike. If we have our lives completely consumed and focused on God, our actions will reflect the will of God. Our personal tastes, however, will not go away. God loves us and wants us to enjoy life. He didn’t create us to be robots, walking around unhappy and bored. He wants us to enjoy life, live it to the fullest. Enjoy and love the people around us. Love those who Jesus loves. Follow God wherever He leads. Don’t Bible-dip to find the answers—talk right to God and He will answer (in his own time, of course). And definitely don’t be examining your toilet for answers. God is big enough that He will answer you and you won’t have to search in your household appliances for the answers. We just have to be willing to receive the answer and do what He says. Our lives wont ever be boring or mundane if we walk in the will of God. God is crazy and chaotic and adventurous—it’s when we’re not walking in His will that life gets boring and purposeless. Sitting and listening to our incomprehensible maker is the only way to live!

Oh, and on another note, I highly recommend this book! It's definitely full of dark, twisted humor, but is incredibly interesting! If you like stories about crazy people, this book is definitely for you!

Touching Untouchables with Bare Hands

I was watching the movie, "The Motorcycle Diaries" the other day about two men, Ernesto Guevara (a med student studying about treating leprosy) and Alberto Granado (a biochemist), who take a road trip around South America-- which made me want to jump online and buy a plane ticket to Argentina! During their journey, they stop by a leper colony to volunteer for a few weeks. On their way to the colony, the head doctor is telling them about the people there and the work they will be doing. The doctor explains to them that the nuns who work there have very strict rules about how things are done around the colony. He then hands them gloves to wear that the nuns require everyone to wear. However, when the doctor hands Ernesto the gloves, Ernesto asks: "Leprosy isn't contagious, right? So these gloves are purely symbolic? Then I wont need these" and he and Alberto hand the gloves back to the doctor. The men then eagerly shake hands with the lepers of the colony who are at first confused, but then embrace the men because of their love and lack of prejudices.
This act of unprejudiced love and understanding really struck me. These men were not "Christians" in the sense of it being a mission trip they were on trying to convert people. They went out to meet people and love those who needed to be loved and have the adventure of their lives.
What struck me was the "tradition" and symbolism of how Christians lead their lives. We go around preaching that we need to love people and love those who Jesus loved, especially those who the world overlooks-- the homeless, the prostitutes, the children,etc. There are those people who do love them and reach out to them, but how often do they touch them with gloved hands? We will only go close enough to help them on the surface-- feed them one meal, give them one new set of clothing-- but fail to actually touch them with our bare hands. We fail to help them and love them where they really need to be loved-- in their hearts and their spirits and show them an unconditional love that Jesus called everyone to. We only go so far to help them, because of fears, prejudices, anger, feeling uncomfortable, etc. We wear gloves to touch them and are afraid to really dig deep to show them the love they need. We need to remove the gloves and actually touch people with our bare hands. People will see that and know that you are showing them a love beyond their understanding. And by touching people with your bare hands will give them an opportunity to give something else back to you in return. If you have gloves on your hands, you cannot give everything and you definitely can't get anything in return.
This is something I am still learning to do and understand, but it is definitely something that can be done. Show people a "gloveless" love. That's what Jesus called us all to do.

Hello Blogging World

Since I continually find myself being lost when conversations turn towards blogs that people wrote or read, I decided to take the plunge and get involved in the whole blogging-subculture. Also, I got tired of only posting blogs on Myspace-- I thought I would share my thoughts and rantings with a broader audience. Well, here I am Blog World! Enjoy!